[he wants to say, then run away from Earthbread altogether, or, I would help you. but there's not much Stardust can do while they are in a dream! giving the other Cookie courage seems to be the only thing Stardust can do for him. after all, you cannot help someone who cannot help themselves. and, if Pavlova truly is trapped, then the only other solution would be to break him out of his cage...
but how?]
Well. I haven't been to Earthbread in a few weeks. I missed all the fighting. Even outside of Earthbread, there will always be pain and suffering. But there is also joy. Watching the sun rise over a hill, following the leaves as they change colors. Truly astonishing things lie beyond this Garden. The war cannot last forever.
[ He's pretty sure the Hollyberrians said similar things when trying to convince his mother to leave. It sounded like nonsense to his ears then. His mother would never be swayed by it. Maybe it's that he's being addressed directly, that Stardust Cookie himself seems so confident in his assertion, or maybe that part of him still wants so badly to see those things himself, but the argument sounds much more convincing now. ]
You know, happiness being fleeting... it's because of that fact that the Garden exists. Despite her cruelty Eternal Sugar Cookie still thinks what she did was best for everyone.
[ She can't see what she became. Part of him wonders if he could have done something about it. The peaceful ambiance suddenly feels claustrophobic, like the invisible barrier keeping him there was closing in. ]
This is partly your dream too, right?
[ He says it quickly, but softly, hushed, like a secret. ]
Then... what's your dream? Let's... go together.
[ Because there was never any way he'd be able to leave on his own. He could convince himself to be fine with the echo of the past instead of reaching for what he wants. ]
[Stardust is quiet for several seconds, his eyes widening. that's right, it's a dream. maybe he was supposed to find Pavlova and show him his own dreams. dreams where he's not lonely, not drifting through endless space, searching for a forgotten home.
saying nothing at first, Stardust Cookie closes his eyes, and the Garden begins to shift into... a busy train station. there are many types of creatures, there, but no humans. and no Eternal Sugar Cookie. everyone is bustling about. it's loud, but no one seems to be afraid.
when Stardust opens his eyes, he'll find he's holding two golden tickets. destination: "anywhere away from the Garden." he holds one ticket to Pavlova]
[ It's been a while since Pavlova has been anywhere this crowded. The amount of hearts this would be in a normal situation would be overwhelming, but thankfully right now he could only read Stardust, and he didn't seem to have many ties to begin with. He puts that aside for the moment as the other Cookie hands him a ticket.
Anywhere away from the Garden.
There's still hesitation, there's still fear, but he's come this far, and it's just a dream, right? She can't get mad about what she doesn't know about.
So he accepts the ticket, and takes the other Cookie's hand for good measure. With how many people were bustling about they might get separated otherwise. ]
[oh? Stardust blinks, glancing down at Pavlova's hand... their hands, joined together. goodness, he can't remember someone ever holding his hand before. except for, maybe, Space Doughnut, but... this feels different, somehow.
in any case, he knows that Pavlova is scared. he can see it. but maybe when they are on the train, they can chat a bit more. away from the confines of the Garden.
he leads them towards the Dream Express, wondering if he is doing the right thing. this all must be according to Moonlight Cookie's plan, right? still, Stardust is apprehensive. he wants to help Pavlova, but what if he can't help him?]
This ticket should tell us where to sit. Once the Conductor comes around, we will need to show her our tickets.
[he gives Pavlova's hand a squeeze before looking down at his ticket to find the seat]
[ It's a bit easier once they're on the train. There was a lot to take in at the station, but it's quieter and more orderly as they find their seats. Predictably right next to each other.
It's an odd feeling, how the fear and excitement mix. He's used to fear winning out in view of the consequences, but here he's being given a chance to do what scares him anyway. To let the excitement of possibility win out. They take their seats and he squeezes Stardust Cookie's hand gently.
He's practically a stranger, and yet he's accepted him more easily than anyone who has ever known him. There's some comfort he finds in that. ]
I wonder where we'll end up... It sounds like you've been a lot of places.
[Stardust muses, glad that they are seated next to each other. today's journey may be more quiet than the others, thanks to this being a dream. it feels like only them are talking right now, even though the train is filled with passengers in the distant background]
I only took up traveling recently, within the past year, or so. Before that, I was wandering through space.
[alone. a slight wince, but he doesn't release Pavlova's hand]
[ Through space? He kind of... glances out the window at the glittering expanse beyond it and... grimaces. Sure, it's freedom, and sure he might not be pursued for what he's done out there, but he'd also be alone, and he hates being alone.
Suddenly Stardust's lack of ties and desire for connection make sense. ]
... Sounds lonely. Is there something you're looking for?
[ Was there a reason he didn't stay with his sister? Surely that would have been better than wandering alone? He doesn't have time to read it just yet, but he gets the sense it's complicated. ]
[ah, his sleepy sister. she is content to wander through the Realm of Dreams, and guard the City of Wizards. but Stardust yearns for much more than that. she has her purpose, but what is his?
he looks out at the twinkling stars, contemplative. he is filled with sorrow, but at least he is free now. he wishes for Pavlova to be free, too]
Something... Someone... My meaning. I do not know what that is.
[his hand curls around Pavlova's hand, a little tense, but not painful enough to hurt him. he continues]
In my dream, I saw a light coming from your Garden. I followed it, and came across you. I knew it was possible for Cookies to meet each other in dreams, but I have never seen a light like that. It definitely was guiding me, I was compelled to follow.
[ If he were his younger self he might have waxed poetic about soulmates and how it must have been fate, but fate's been cruel to him before, and affairs of the heart can be delicate to those new to it, which Stardust seemed to be.
More than anything he doesn't want to get his own hopes up after his heart was shattered. It wouldn't be fair to either of them.
Pavlova returns the hold, but his firmness is to anchor and support while Stardust speaks ]
I've never really figured that out either. My life felt pretty much decided for me from the moment I was baked... but my father used to say that learning was half the fun of knowing. Makes you appreciate it more. The context was different but it feels like it applies. I think you'll find it one day. It just might take time to narrow down what you want...
[ As for what could have compelled him to join his dream, he couldn't say. Stardust's happiness seems to mostly lie with making connection. He'll probably be able to figure out what he wants to do once he finds people he can belong with. ]
[honestly, the whole soulmates idea is strange to him. Stardust thought that he and his sister were kind of like familial soulmates, but, even then, she had her own duties, and did not accompany him on his journey. and, sure, Stardust made a few friends on the train, but he doesn't consider Space Doughnut or Milky Way to be particularly close to him.
so, what does he want out of this? he has no idea.
he listens, humming thoughtfully]
I do love traveling. I wish to learn more about other Cookies, and the various lifeforms I meet on other planets. My own Creator also wrote something similar to what your father said; he believed that I should carve my own path, and that I would have the opportunity to become something "beyond imagination." I believe that is why he sent my dough into space.
[ If it were him, he'd probably be worried about if what he wanted was grand enough to fit words like that. On some level he already feels pressure just due to his parentage. ]
Hmm. I can't say I know everything, but I might be able to answer some things if you have questions. I've been around for a really long time.
[ It seems like they both have, though. How long must he have been in space for... despite everything he's gone through, he can at least say there were people around even if he had to be careful interacting with them.
Part of him wants to say he doesn't have to be alone anymore, the other part doesn't want to wake up and become a liar.
But he can give Stardust Cookie tonight if nothing else. ]
[ His gaze falls to his lap for a moment while he thought of how to phrase this. ]
The reason she became a beast was due to happiness being so fleeting. She often would grant Cookies happiness only for them to leave and for something horrible to happen. In her eyes if we stay with her, she can keep us safe and happy. That's part of it.
[ he sighs softly ]
And the other part is that she's my mother. When I said I've never known anywhere else, I meant it. I was raised there since I was a baby dough.
She probably did, before she fell. She just... became so desperate to hold onto any scrap of happiness she could and preserve it.
She couldn't see the merit in risking the danger of the outside world after having lost so many to unavoidable things like illness and monster attacks, and even though I can fight well I've always... somewhat feared leaving the Garden's safety. At least I know how to handle things there.
Especially now, with the war, it feels like there's no place for me outside its borders.
[ Child of the Beasts, servant of sloth. Many would hold a grudge against him for having been involved, willing or not. And it isn't as though he started completely unwilling. He just... came to see how far they'd fallen. He has no excuses he can really give. ]
[they're still holding hands, even as dream Milky Way Cookie comes to check their tickets. all things are good. she's only a dream, so she doesn't really react to seeing Stardust, but he smiles at her before focusing on Pavlova again and she goes on her way]
...For eons, I was drifting through space, with only the stars as my comfort. I, too, was trapped, by my own thoughts, my own worries. Even after I was thawed and baked by starlight, I was trapped in an endless cycle of my fears. The only one keeping me locked up was... myself. It took me meeting others to realize I did not have to stay in this prison of sorrow.
[he's still sad, but he's also free to do as he wants. he doesn't think his words will hold water when compared to Pavlova's plight. after all, Pavlova is being trapped by someone else, and it sounds like he believes he is unworthy of freedom]
[ He's quiet as he considers Starlight's words, handing over the ticket when prompted. ]
It was a "friend" of mine... that made me dream of freedom the most. She was a prisoner of the Garden herself, the enchantment on her made her loyal and she did whatever she was asked... but I would try over and over to get her to question her containment. Question what she thought was happiness. Try to get her to want to leave.
[ His smile turned a little bitter ]
I failed. She finally found freedom, but I couldn't join her. She didn't look back even once.
[ It's not to say he's not happy she's free, but it stung that he meant so little to her after so long. ]
... All that to say I'm probably similar. It's not easy to do that kind of thing alone.
[Stardust listens, and, boy, Pavlova’s story continues to tug at his jamstrings. the more he learns, the more frustrated he feels. the guy can’t catch a break.
at first, he was happy that Pavlova seemed to have a friend, even if they were both prisoners together. Stardust cannot blame Pavlova’s friend for running while she could, but he can’t blame Pavlova for being bitter about that, also. Stardust believes Pavlova, and doesn’t question his actions]
…But you want it, don’t you? You wish to run away, the same as her.
[he looks in Pavlova’s eyecings, serious and almost covert. what if Pavlova had help?]
[ Is it any wonder he feels so trapped when things always seem to go wrong for him? At some point you just give up. ]
I... I do. I don't want to leave my mother, but nothing I've tried can snap her out of it.
[ And it's to the point he doesn't doubt she'd hurt him to keep him there like anyone else. To the point he's scared of her, which only enables the behavior in the end. Maybe leaving would... help her see what she's become more than staying?
Or maybe that's what he's telling himself to offload his guilt. He's not sure anymore. ]
[that’s all the confirmation Stardust needs. after a moment, a small smile comes to his face. a gentle expression]
Then, I will assist you. I don’t know how, but I will try to get you out of your Mother’s Garden.
[he’s not saying Pavlova should hate his Mother, or the Garden, or even the rest of the Beasts. Stardust simply wishes for Pavlova to be able to leave if he wants. his hand curls a little tighter.
[ He could try to run now while she's distracted, but would that make things worse? At this point Dark Enchantress Cookie seems like more of an active threat than the beast cookies, and that's saying something.
He can try to look on the brighter side, though. Even if its a weak effort. ]
[yes, the war still looms. and... they should probably try to find each other after that. Stardust doesn't even know where to begin looking. Pavlova said something about a mountain range, and it's in Beast-Yeast.
but he's not afraid. he's strong!]
Indeed. I wish I could do more for you, now. I can at least start making my way towards you.
With how things were going the islands will be covered in char and crumbs, So I doubt it will be hard to find...
[ And also the giant evil spell circle Pav could see from where he was hiding. He is not looking forward to finding what that was about! ]
There's a set of islands to the south of Beast-Yeast. That's where the war is being fought. The Garden is usually on the peninsula on the southern, central part of Beast-Yeast. West of the mountains.
[ since he's not sure how quickly Eternal Sugar will retreat afterward. Better to cover their bases... ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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but how?]
Well. I haven't been to Earthbread in a few weeks. I missed all the fighting. Even outside of Earthbread, there will always be pain and suffering. But there is also joy. Watching the sun rise over a hill, following the leaves as they change colors. Truly astonishing things lie beyond this Garden. The war cannot last forever.
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[ He's pretty sure the Hollyberrians said similar things when trying to convince his mother to leave. It sounded like nonsense to his ears then. His mother would never be swayed by it. Maybe it's that he's being addressed directly, that Stardust Cookie himself seems so confident in his assertion, or maybe that part of him still wants so badly to see those things himself, but the argument sounds much more convincing now. ]
You know, happiness being fleeting... it's because of that fact that the Garden exists. Despite her cruelty Eternal Sugar Cookie still thinks what she did was best for everyone.
[ She can't see what she became. Part of him wonders if he could have done something about it. The peaceful ambiance suddenly feels claustrophobic, like the invisible barrier keeping him there was closing in. ]
This is partly your dream too, right?
[ He says it quickly, but softly, hushed, like a secret. ]
Then... what's your dream? Let's... go together.
[ Because there was never any way he'd be able to leave on his own. He could convince himself to be fine with the echo of the past instead of reaching for what he wants. ]
they took the midnight train going anywhere
saying nothing at first, Stardust Cookie closes his eyes, and the Garden begins to shift into... a busy train station. there are many types of creatures, there, but no humans. and no Eternal Sugar Cookie. everyone is bustling about. it's loud, but no one seems to be afraid.
when Stardust opens his eyes, he'll find he's holding two golden tickets. destination: "anywhere away from the Garden." he holds one ticket to Pavlova]
Come with me, if only for a moment.
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[ It's been a while since Pavlova has been anywhere this crowded. The amount of hearts this would be in a normal situation would be overwhelming, but thankfully right now he could only read Stardust, and he didn't seem to have many ties to begin with. He puts that aside for the moment as the other Cookie hands him a ticket.
Anywhere away from the Garden.
There's still hesitation, there's still fear, but he's come this far, and it's just a dream, right? She can't get mad about what she doesn't know about.
So he accepts the ticket, and takes the other Cookie's hand for good measure. With how many people were bustling about they might get separated otherwise. ]
Of course. I... wouldn't want to go alone anyway.
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in any case, he knows that Pavlova is scared. he can see it. but maybe when they are on the train, they can chat a bit more. away from the confines of the Garden.
he leads them towards the Dream Express, wondering if he is doing the right thing. this all must be according to Moonlight Cookie's plan, right? still, Stardust is apprehensive. he wants to help Pavlova, but what if he can't help him?]
This ticket should tell us where to sit. Once the Conductor comes around, we will need to show her our tickets.
[he gives Pavlova's hand a squeeze before looking down at his ticket to find the seat]
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[ It's a bit easier once they're on the train. There was a lot to take in at the station, but it's quieter and more orderly as they find their seats. Predictably right next to each other.
It's an odd feeling, how the fear and excitement mix. He's used to fear winning out in view of the consequences, but here he's being given a chance to do what scares him anyway. To let the excitement of possibility win out. They take their seats and he squeezes Stardust Cookie's hand gently.
He's practically a stranger, and yet he's accepted him more easily than anyone who has ever known him. There's some comfort he finds in that. ]
I wonder where we'll end up... It sounds like you've been a lot of places.
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[Stardust muses, glad that they are seated next to each other. today's journey may be more quiet than the others, thanks to this being a dream. it feels like only them are talking right now, even though the train is filled with passengers in the distant background]
I only took up traveling recently, within the past year, or so. Before that, I was wandering through space.
[alone. a slight wince, but he doesn't release Pavlova's hand]
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[ Through space? He kind of... glances out the window at the glittering expanse beyond it and... grimaces. Sure, it's freedom, and sure he might not be pursued for what he's done out there, but he'd also be alone, and he hates being alone.
Suddenly Stardust's lack of ties and desire for connection make sense. ]
... Sounds lonely. Is there something you're looking for?
[ Was there a reason he didn't stay with his sister? Surely that would have been better than wandering alone? He doesn't have time to read it just yet, but he gets the sense it's complicated. ]
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he looks out at the twinkling stars, contemplative. he is filled with sorrow, but at least he is free now. he wishes for Pavlova to be free, too]
Something... Someone... My meaning. I do not know what that is.
[his hand curls around Pavlova's hand, a little tense, but not painful enough to hurt him. he continues]
In my dream, I saw a light coming from your Garden. I followed it, and came across you. I knew it was possible for Cookies to meet each other in dreams, but I have never seen a light like that. It definitely was guiding me, I was compelled to follow.
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[ If he were his younger self he might have waxed poetic about soulmates and how it must have been fate, but fate's been cruel to him before, and affairs of the heart can be delicate to those new to it, which Stardust seemed to be.
More than anything he doesn't want to get his own hopes up after his heart was shattered. It wouldn't be fair to either of them.
Pavlova returns the hold, but his firmness is to anchor and support while Stardust speaks ]
I've never really figured that out either. My life felt pretty much decided for me from the moment I was baked... but my father used to say that learning was half the fun of knowing. Makes you appreciate it more. The context was different but it feels like it applies. I think you'll find it one day. It just might take time to narrow down what you want...
[ As for what could have compelled him to join his dream, he couldn't say. Stardust's happiness seems to mostly lie with making connection. He'll probably be able to figure out what he wants to do once he finds people he can belong with. ]
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so, what does he want out of this? he has no idea.
he listens, humming thoughtfully]
I do love traveling. I wish to learn more about other Cookies, and the various lifeforms I meet on other planets. My own Creator also wrote something similar to what your father said; he believed that I should carve my own path, and that I would have the opportunity to become something "beyond imagination." I believe that is why he sent my dough into space.
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[ If it were him, he'd probably be worried about if what he wanted was grand enough to fit words like that. On some level he already feels pressure just due to his parentage. ]
Hmm. I can't say I know everything, but I might be able to answer some things if you have questions. I've been around for a really long time.
[ It seems like they both have, though. How long must he have been in space for... despite everything he's gone through, he can at least say there were people around even if he had to be careful interacting with them.
Part of him wants to say he doesn't have to be alone anymore, the other part doesn't want to wake up and become a liar.
But he can give Stardust Cookie tonight if nothing else. ]
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...I wish to know more about your ke--
[he was going to say "keeper" but thinks better of it. that would be rude!]
Erm, Eternal Sugar Cookie. Why is she so insistent on keeping you in the Garden?
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Well...
[ His gaze falls to his lap for a moment while he thought of how to phrase this. ]
The reason she became a beast was due to happiness being so fleeting. She often would grant Cookies happiness only for them to leave and for something horrible to happen. In her eyes if we stay with her, she can keep us safe and happy. That's part of it.
[ he sighs softly ]
And the other part is that she's my mother. When I said I've never known anywhere else, I meant it. I was raised there since I was a baby dough.
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I did not doubt you. I would think that, as your mother, she would wish for you to forge your own happiness, not thrust her own upon you.
[but that is why she is a Beast, correct? her sense of happiness is obviously warped]
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She probably did, before she fell. She just... became so desperate to hold onto any scrap of happiness she could and preserve it.
She couldn't see the merit in risking the danger of the outside world after having lost so many to unavoidable things like illness and monster attacks, and even though I can fight well I've always... somewhat feared leaving the Garden's safety. At least I know how to handle things there.
Especially now, with the war, it feels like there's no place for me outside its borders.
[ Child of the Beasts, servant of sloth. Many would hold a grudge against him for having been involved, willing or not. And it isn't as though he started completely unwilling. He just... came to see how far they'd fallen. He has no excuses he can really give. ]
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...For eons, I was drifting through space, with only the stars as my comfort. I, too, was trapped, by my own thoughts, my own worries. Even after I was thawed and baked by starlight, I was trapped in an endless cycle of my fears. The only one keeping me locked up was... myself. It took me meeting others to realize I did not have to stay in this prison of sorrow.
[he's still sad, but he's also free to do as he wants. he doesn't think his words will hold water when compared to Pavlova's plight. after all, Pavlova is being trapped by someone else, and it sounds like he believes he is unworthy of freedom]
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[ He's quiet as he considers Starlight's words, handing over the ticket when prompted. ]
It was a "friend" of mine... that made me dream of freedom the most. She was a prisoner of the Garden herself, the enchantment on her made her loyal and she did whatever she was asked... but I would try over and over to get her to question her containment. Question what she thought was happiness. Try to get her to want to leave.
[ His smile turned a little bitter ]
I failed. She finally found freedom, but I couldn't join her. She didn't look back even once.
[ It's not to say he's not happy she's free, but it stung that he meant so little to her after so long. ]
... All that to say I'm probably similar. It's not easy to do that kind of thing alone.
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[Stardust listens, and, boy, Pavlova’s story continues to tug at his jamstrings. the more he learns, the more frustrated he feels. the guy can’t catch a break.
at first, he was happy that Pavlova seemed to have a friend, even if they were both prisoners together. Stardust cannot blame Pavlova’s friend for running while she could, but he can’t blame Pavlova for being bitter about that, also. Stardust believes Pavlova, and doesn’t question his actions]
…But you want it, don’t you? You wish to run away, the same as her.
[he looks in Pavlova’s eyecings, serious and almost covert. what if Pavlova had help?]
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[ Is it any wonder he feels so trapped when things always seem to go wrong for him? At some point you just give up. ]
I... I do. I don't want to leave my mother, but nothing I've tried can snap her out of it.
[ And it's to the point he doesn't doubt she'd hurt him to keep him there like anyone else. To the point he's scared of her, which only enables the behavior in the end. Maybe leaving would... help her see what she's become more than staying?
Or maybe that's what he's telling himself to offload his guilt. He's not sure anymore. ]
I don't want to do this anymore.
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Then, I will assist you. I don’t know how, but I will try to get you out of your Mother’s Garden.
[he’s not saying Pavlova should hate his Mother, or the Garden, or even the rest of the Beasts. Stardust simply wishes for Pavlova to be able to leave if he wants. his hand curls a little tighter.
Moonlight Cookie, is this his purpose?]
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We'll have to see what happens first, I guess...
[ He returns the tight hold ]
I'm not sure how this war will end.
[ He could try to run now while she's distracted, but would that make things worse? At this point Dark Enchantress Cookie seems like more of an active threat than the beast cookies, and that's saying something.
He can try to look on the brighter side, though. Even if its a weak effort. ]
But... it's something to look forward to..?
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but he's not afraid. he's strong!]
Indeed. I wish I could do more for you, now. I can at least start making my way towards you.
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With how things were going the islands will be covered in char and crumbs, So I doubt it will be hard to find...
[ And also the giant evil spell circle Pav could see from where he was hiding. He is not looking forward to finding what that was about! ]
There's a set of islands to the south of Beast-Yeast. That's where the war is being fought. The Garden is usually on the peninsula on the southern, central part of Beast-Yeast. West of the mountains.
[ since he's not sure how quickly Eternal Sugar will retreat afterward. Better to cover their bases... ]
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..."Usually?"
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